世上只有妈妈好

世上只有妈妈好
有妈的孩子像个宝
投入妈妈的怀抱
幸福享不了

To my non-Chinese readers, the above, along with the title, is a Chinese nursery rhyme praising motherhood, saying that children with mothers are like treasures, and when in your mother's hold, happiness is plentiful.

I'm also quite surprised that I chose such a simple phrase for tonight's post. This is a song that many of us have sang since we were young, in nursery or kindergarten, maybe even before that. I was about to write about my state of affairs, but I found something more meaningful to write about this evening.

I actually just got back from visiting a friend. Her twin 1-year-old sons were warded at KK Hospital for quite a range of ailments. A common friend asked me along, and I thought I'd drop by to see how she's coping.

Just to give you some background: This friend of mine is my age, so you know she's not that old. She's a young mother, and is bearing quite a heavy responsibility at such a young age (whoever said taking care of 2 baby boys is easy?). We've actually known each other for quite a while because of common activities, and she confides in me sometimes, before her marriage, but that's not to say we're very close too.

The sight when I first got there was quite shocking. She was there alone, having to take care of both her sons. She was looking rather exhausted, having to take leave from her nursing job for the past 5 days to take care of her sons, which is really quite a handful. When she carries one, the other starts crying, so she has to swap between the two, and both don't like it when she sits down while carrying them.

Throughout the whole duration I was there, I didn't see her husband around. Quite unusual, seeing that 2 of his sons are admitted into hospital, and I seriously doubt the SAF holds regulars back any later than 7pm! I seriously doubt he even called his wife to inform her about his whereabouts, nor ask about the latest updates on the boys, but let's not discuss this for now.

While we were talking to the mother, she said one thing that made me know she had really embraced motherhood. Her words to me were something along the lines of "I don't ask for much, all I want is for my sons to be well. Seeing them in this stage really breaks my heart."

Yeah yeah, I know some of you may be saying this is very cliche, but I think it's really a different experience seeing someone I know as a friend say this to me. For her, being a young mother is not easy. She had to give up a lot of opportunities and possible-experiences to take up this heavy responsibility. Whilst many of us are still out there enjoying our singlehood, making the best of our paychecks behind bar counters, here is someone who has joined the ranks of those in another phase of life.

And that got me thinking, is motherhood really that much of a life-changing experience as they all say it is? This is truly one of the most personal experiences I have had with an individual I knew pre- and post-expectancy. Well, I've seen many of my cousins growing up, getting married and having kids, but I can't say I know them very closely as a friend, although I have observed some of these transition signs.

It does lead one, especially a single person, to wonder. I obviously don't have the opportunity to know how my own mum was like before she became a mother, but I have seen the many sacrifices she has made over the years bringing us up. Of course she's not the best in everything she does, but she still scores beyond an A+ for effort. And then I ponder upon the need for a second Sunday every year in May to be declared a special day to honour mothers... Isn't every day already a Mother's Day? And that leads me to my concluding thought:

When was the last time, if ever, that you truly and sincerely thanked your own mother for every single thing she has done for you?